Selfie post

How Her Selfie Broke Our Trust

There has been plenty of talk about how social media comes in the middle of relationships and how it can directly affect your self-esteem and the way you view yourself and your life. I have related to how people could get down while comparing themselves to others as they scroll through newsfeeds filled with promotions, engagements, and great hair; but only recently was I the victim of heartache caused by social media. I have felt sorry for myself on the weekends while stuck at my retail management job as friends and/or acquaintances post on instagram, twitter, and Facebook pictures and comments of their boat cruises, boozy brunches, and late night weekend outings – and it has for sure made angry and jealous. I have also been guilty of not understanding the big deal of it all when hearing how pictures have come between relationships and have even rolled my eyes over girlfriends being upset over what or whom their boyfriends were “liking” on Facebook. I would be lying if I said I had not also been a bit jealous in the past when my boyfriend’s liked a hot model and it showed up on my newsfeed, but only recently had a favorite social media “selfie” broken our trust completely.

One thing to make clear about this story is that had I not been lurking around his computer I would never be dealing with the aftermath of what I came across. I do not suggest you follow my footsteps and snoop through your boyfriend’s personal things but I am sharing with you my findings in hopes to make girls aware of where your selfie might end up when you post them on the internet. Clicking around in my now ex’s pictures file, I found a hidden obvious “alone time” file that was full of saved porn pictures which to me seemed pretty normal until my curiosity pushed me to see what kind of porn he was into. As I flipped through his library of different sexy girls he found on different porn websites a familiar face popped up. There she was in her bikini on a beach smiling back at me, a childhood friend of my boyfriend’s whose relationship to me was never clear or comfortable. I had questioned how my boyfriend felt about “his bestie” for the full three years we had been dating, and thinking back to our first few months of dating she was the start of our first fight after watching the two of them indulge in conversation in the pool ignoring my existence for hours.

When I came across these particular pictures that I had also seen due to being forced into a friendship with her on social media outlets, it felt as if my heart stopped and I was not sure if I wanted to cry or throw his computer against the wall. The man I loved was getting off on Facebook pictures of a friend of his who was uploading hot pictures of herself on social media and to me I felt cheated, hurt and angry. A couple lessons that I learned from this was to always trust my instincts in the future if I think my man has feelings for a close girlfriend, and the second is to not upload sexy pictures of myself on social media because who knows who is saving them for later- YUCK! Needless to say, my boyfriend and I have broken up, and I have joined the many others in the social media selfie recovering cases.


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