A road trip from South Florida to Jacksonville with my Uncle for his middle daughter’s 21st birthday party could be the start to a new relationship with my biological farther. One of my favorite personality traits of my uncle is his love for story telling and communicating. He generally enjoys and appreciates the time together to tell lots of stories, give advice, and make you feel loved. I’ve never met my dad and my uncle knows that so he decided to give me his thoughts on what he thinks on this situation.
My uncle grew up in the same household as my mom and told me that although their family was dysfunctional, it was nowhere near the dysfunction that my biological fathers family seemed to have. He described my dad’s brother as scum and said that his family was very poor, and lived in a very bad part of town. My uncle knows that his family had problems and that his sister (my mom) definitely made poor decisions that he did not think were neccessary considering the fact that the three siblings always had a roof over their head, and food to eat, and eachother. He wanted me to keep in my mind that my father also made those same poor decisions but did not seem to have the same alternative options to bad. He opened my ears and mind to thinking from my dad’s side of this story and how he did not have family that cared about what happened to him or family trying to get him to turn his life around like my mother had.
I decided to take this information and positive advice to heart and give my father a chance. The first step was an easy one and I wrote him a three page letter updating him on my life. Quick response from this because he contacted me soon after with a letter and a request for a phone call. I want to make this phone call and I am working on getting ready for it. We exchanged Christmas Cards since the letters and he signed this card with his phone number. This year I am going to pick up the phone and call him because I believe in creating this relationship with my dad.
I believe that there are always two sides to a story and in this situation of my mother and father it was two sides to a bad story, and I want a happy ending.